All That Will Ever Be
by Morbid DramaQueen10
Summary: She had one chance, one possibility and she took it, not knowing the cost to her Doctor. "The Parting of the Ways" through Rose's POV. 9/Rose/TARDIS.Oneshot.


**This is my 2****nd**** Doctor Who story, my first with 9 and Rose. It takes place over the course of "The Parting of the Ways" mainly from Rose's POV. She's my favourite companion. I thought the ending was rather fast, and the mental aspects on either side could perhaps be looked at a little closer. Besides that, what the heck was the Doctor thinking? That is always the question, isn't it?**

**Reviews welcome!**

**Rated PG**

There is a blinding light, something fiery—yet cold—that rushes into her. For the next few moments, she's no longer in control, an observer to her own actions her own words. It's a sort of out-of-body experience, the kind you hear about on the telly when you watch that Sy-Fy network. She's still in her body, though, just not actively participating in the events surrounding her.

Out of all the things she had expected, possession had not been remotely considered. Rose believed that once the machine comprehended her goal it would simply take her there, no questions asked.

Somewhere in the back of her mind, she realizes that the door to the TARDIS has shut itself, effectively locking a poor, confused, over-worked Mickey out, leaving him on the darkening streets of South London. The ship is awake once more, ready to save her master. Rose can feel every jolt of energy, the rocking and swaying of the police box as it zooms through the void. A crackling sense of _knowing_ runs along her form. Yes, yes, _yes. _Something in the TARDIS tells her that they will reach success.

He's there. Standing stock-still. In the leather jacket, v-neck jumper peeking out from worn edges, he looks to be a thousand years old, the creases across his face deeper than ever before. To an outsider, he would appear blank, emotionless. Only she can see his mixture of calm and fear, reluctance and readiness. Perhaps it is the TARDIS's insight into his mind. Or maybe her own knowledge of the Doctor. _Her_ Doctor.

When he sees her, the fear grows more pronounced across his aged features. She has done the impossible, the fatal, all for him. He knew Rose trusted him, but to see so much dedication… none of his traveling mates had ever strived so hard to save him.

Her eyes glow with an alien power. The shop-girl from London has more flowing through her human mind than ever before. Even now, she feels the pain, the burden and the weight of the task, knows that this cannot possibly end well.

Yet, there is a chance. And it is far too late now to withdraw.

"What have you done?" The Doctor shields his eyes. Nothing can hide his look of pure horror, scrawled across his face. He is blinded by her, scared and in awe all in the same moment.

Rose opens her mouth, saying words that are not her own. Nevertheless, they feel natural. Right. "I looked into the TARDIS and the TARDIS looked into me."

"You looked into the Time Vortex, Rose, nobody is supposed to see that!"

_But I did. For you._

"This is the abomination!"

"Exterminate!"  
A flash of laser is sent her direction. Rose mechanically defects the shot, her sightless eyes never leaving her Doctor's frozen form.

"I am the Bad Wolf. I create myself. I take the words..."She proclaims in the unearthly, ethereal voice. No accent, no uncultured grammar. A pure, harmonic voice. Each letter is pronounced carefully. "...and I scatter them, in time and space. A message, to lead myself here." With one glowing hand, Rose gestures at the letters, causing them to drift away under her power, moving into her past.

His voice is desperate, pleading with the creature before him. "Rose, you've got to stop this, you've got to stop this now! You've the entire _vortex_ running through your head, you're gonna burn!" So much power easily overwhelms a human. He suspects the only thing that has kept her alive this long is the TARDIS, by whatever means the ancient spacecraft has.

"I want you safe. My Doctor..." The eternal voice grows soft. Her burning eyes lock onto his fearful ones. "Protected from the false God."

"You cannot hurt me. I am immortal!"

"You are tiny." Rose hisses. "I can see the whole of time and space, _every single atom_ of your existence, and I…I divide them!"

One motion, and a Dalek sees its last, blown away by some unseen wind.

"Everything must come to dust. All things…everything dies." _Even me. _

Her Doctor is on the ground, staring up at glorious Rose, brilliant Rose as she gives the final blow. "The time war ends!"  
Sheer, raw power charges through Rose Tyler and it is all directed toward the crazed Dalek Emperor and his fleet of human-Dalek hybrids. The light in her eyes flares as the entire lot explodes into golden dust, forever particles in space, insignificant. All that is left is the reverberating echo of: "_I will not die! I cannot die!"_

A silence overtakes their surroundings. He's breathing heavily, staring at this beautiful, powerful girl…no, woman…who has just saved his life and the life of billions.

"Rose, you've done it. Now stop." She doesn't move a centimeter."Just let go." _Please. Release her. _

"How can I let go of this? I bring…life." A room away, she finds Jack, dashing, charming Jack and hastens to breathe life back into her friend. The man jerks forward, air rushing to fill his empty lungs.

"But this is wrong! You can't control life and death!" This will kill her. Nobody human was ever meant to see into the Vortex. _She_ wasn't meant to see into the Vortex. Typical Rose, surprising him at every corner.

"But I can! The sun and the moon, the day and night…" Rose is about to continue with these stolen, unfamiliar words when the pain flares, blurring her vision. Or is that the tears? Scalding hot tears fall down her face, symbols of the pain flooding her body."...but why do they hurt?"

She has never heard him so terrified. Her Doctor lies there on the ground, petrified. "The power's gonna kill you and it's my fault!"

But it wasn't. Why would he ever think that? She's here to rescue him, not…not scare him. Doctor…her Doctor…it wasn't his fault, not at all…so much _pain-_

"I can see everything... all that is... all that was...and all that ever could be." And that is enough. Because she can see them. Everything that they could be.

He stands, edging cautiously toward the flaming girl. "But that's what _I_ see. All the time. And doesn't it drive you mad?"

_Yes. No. It's worth it. Worth it._ "My head..." Rose jerks her hands upward. Tears make slow, wet trails down her glowing cheeks.

"C'mere."

" ...it's killing me." Quite literally. Rose feels like dying, wants to end it then and there.

"I think you need a Doctor." He crushes his lips to hers, burning in the process; accepting the burden of the alien energy.

Then she knows. Rose might not be in full control of her body, but her mind explodes with feeling. He is _everything. _Every moment of the universe is in his mind, every life-changing after, every world-alter second is in his mind. He is every gesture, every touch, every word that could've been. He is light and dark and earth and sky and hot and cold and sun and moon and rain and heat and every season there is. The fire consuming her mind, engulfs them together.

They both savor the kiss. He wonders if it'll be his very last, then realizes he doesn't care. If it is his last, it's his last. At the very least, he receives it as _her _Doctor. He could wish for nothing more. He's resigned himself to his end, knowing that he, the Doctor, Rose's Doctor, could leave this universe a happy man. As Jack had put it, Rose was worth fighting for. Worth dying for.

She falls back. Before Rose completely loses consciousness, she realizes the TARDIS's strange control over her has fallen and she has full, complete, entire jurisdiction over her body once more. Well, nearly. She cannot keep herself awake, cannot stop her body from sinking to the ground below the machine. All is dark.

Back on the TARDIS, after proclaiming them absolutely fantastic, the Doctor has one final coherent thought before the energy consumes him. He knows she wants to start yelling at him, demand why he would've sent her off like that. He regrets that he will be missing the verbal battering, regrets the fact that he won't be slapped by either her or Jackie ever again, and will never again hold her hand. Not in this form, anyways.

He wants to watch her grow older. Tease her horridly. Hold her hand as they run for their lives, or grip it tightly as they run into danger. He wishes he could hold her again, explain all of his thoughts, his actions, his reasoning. Tell her how much it hurt when she turned him down that first time, that it had practically taken all the power in the cosmos to convince him to build up the courage to return and ask her again.

But no. He would have to settle with being a spectator in his own mind, watching a new version of himself hold her hand. Maybe she could fall for the new him. Perhaps the ears might be smaller, the face-less old and daft. That could make things easier.

As the golden flames erupted, he lets go of his last remaining thought:

He should've kissed her ages ago. This new regeneration better make a habit of it.

"Hello! Okay... New teeth. That's weird. So where was I? Oh, that's right - Barcelona!"


End file.
